Finding Middle Ground in Your Life and Divorce

Without a doubt, the best lesson I have learned through this life is a simple, yet powerful truth, “People will do to you in life what you allow them to do.”  I see it every day with my clients, they ask, “How did this happen to me?”  If I am painfully honest with myself, most of the really bad stuff that has happened to me was due to my allowing it.  At 46, with 20 years of practicing law, comes a clarity and a peace, or you burn out from the intensity of it all.  There is a desire to help others to avoid pain or find strength, to make the process not just bearable, but an opportunity.   I think one of the most important things that make me a good lawyer is I have been through it.  I do not ask people to do things I haven’t done myself.  I can say with experience, share your child, spend less money, do the right thing, (even when the other party does not), be strong, forgive, and perhaps, most importantly, own your piece of this situation so you...

Embrace your Less than Perfect Life and Find a Happier Marriage Perhaps the worst thing anyone ever came up with is the idea we can "have it at all".  The idea that we can be perfect partners, parents, lovers, friends, and employees.  We can do it all and can do it all without help, support, and complaining, all the while looking like a supermodel.  The idea that we can be all things to all people sets us up from the start to fail.  The eternal quest for more money, more affirmation, and to "have it all", is frankly, exhausting.  In my experience as a divorce attorney, this leads to two very tough problems to overcome, resentment and disappointment, as life is less than perfect, sometimes culminating in a trip to my office. I have a sister-in-law who is beautiful, smart and ridiculously talented.  She does it “all” and recently moved into a beautiful new home, all the while planning a big family party within a week’s time.  Of course, she will...